Or more accurately, I hate what Sheryl Crow invokes the memory of.
For those of you who have followed my blog since the beginning, you know that in the process of coming out, there was only one friend that I lost. We had been friends since high school, which was about nine years, and roommates for four of those. It was unfortunate, but it happened. It has now been about sixteen months since I spoke with her. The last communication I had from her was an email...which we won't really talk about.
Her favorite music was the musical stylings of Sheryl Crow. Non-stop. Road trips, cleaning the house, running the errands, Sheryl Crow. Of course, mixed in with other things, but a lot of Sheryl Crow. I even went to her concert with my friend because she couldn't find anyone else to go with her. At that point, I didn't mind the music but it wasn't my favorite. I had an okay time at the concert so it wasn't a complete loss.
Now she's definitely not my favorite.
I know that I am still bothered about the way our friendship ended. There were a lot of things that went unresolved I suppose. There are things I wish I would have said, but after the email, I decided that it would be better to just not respond. After all, the Golden Rule teaches us that if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.
I hate that every silver Honda Civic makes me remember her. I hate that Sheryl Crow plays on the muzak channel at work. It's really annoying to me. She was my friend for nine years and in the end, she treated me like someone she had known for nine weeks. I don't want to be reminded of her anymore. I don't want to think about her anymore.
So why am I?
Yikes.
17 November 2010
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1 comments:
It is REALLY hard to lose a relationship, especially one where you have had a lot of time, energy, and emotion vested. I feel for you. It has been 20 years since I "lost" the love of my life. EVERY time I hear an Amy Grant song or see a Volvo Stationwagon, I am immediately taken back to my friend and all we shared and had. Luckily, I do not have music playing at work with Amy Grant music on it, like you do with Sheryl Crow. That was one thing that helped me get away from all of the hurt, not to PURPOSELY listen to any music that might remind me.
Sending good energy your way.
Happy night.
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