21 December 2010

Gay It Forward

I don't know if any of you watch Will and Grace.  I watched it all the time when I was younger but there were so many jokes lost on me.  Now that I'm out, it's absolutely hysterical.  I don't get to watch it a lot now, but I happened to catch an episode last night.

The premise for the episode is that Karen sets up Will with her cousin Barry.  Barry just came out.  Will doesn't want to go out with him because he doesn't appear attractive and he's shy.  Jack meets up with them at the restaurant just after Will has let Barry down easy.  He tells Will that they should help Barry, coach him, teach him.

JACK: The point is, we senior gays have a responsibility to the freshmen. To teach them, to bring them along. Why, I helped turn this caterpillar into a chubby butterfly. And now you should do the same for Barry.
WILL: Why? Why is this my responsibility?
JACK: Because that's what we do in the community. We gay it forward.

I wouldn't consider myself a senior gay yet, but I know I'm not a freshman anymore either.  It's nice to have some confidence and some experience, for lack of a better word, behind me now.  

The "freshmen" come in all shapes and sizes, all ages, all types.  And I feel for you.  It's not easy.  So how do we "gay it forward" for them?  

I like the "It Gets Better" Project, reaching out to people and letting them know that life can get better than however it is right now.  I like this blogging sphere and the great sense of community we have.  I like that the Nicholson's have parties so we can socialize and get to know each other and interact.  I like that Abelard maintains the MoHo Directory so we can read each other's blogs and be supportive of each other through daily life.  And I have learned that even just blogging about your experience can help someone out.  Sometimes just being yourself can help someone be less afraid to be who they are.

I wish that I had the means and the time to do more.  This world can be such a beautiful place, even though there are dark hours experienced upon it.  There is a lot of love out there too.  You just don't hear about as much.  Love is soft and gentle.  Love doesn't make it on the news a lot of time, but it's there.  It's here.  Arms waiting to surround you, accept you, help you heal.  

Gay it forward.  I love it.


"Lucky Jake" said...

Haha! I remember this episode. Loved that show. :)

Kim Nordyke said...

Love this one. Love the idea. It makes me think about being a "senior" gay ... Not sure I qualify, either. Though I am 44 years old and have been "out" for a while now, I've merely been out as "gay, but not acting on it." Until recently I had to drop the last 5 words. So now am I a freshman all over again? I feel like it ... I do appreciate all the insight offered by those who have "been there" longer than I have. Good stuff.

Jenz said...

Girl...let me know if you have any questions. I've been there ... done that.

Love Will and Grace!

FindingMyWay said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
FindingMyWay said...

Missing your posts...

drakames said...

Kim: Because life is ever changing and always in motion, I think it's possible to be a freshmen one day, feel like a junior or senior the next, and then back to a freshmen again (to use every bit of the metaphor). It's all good. We all have experience and confidence in different areas, and that's why it's awesome that we're all in this together. We can help each other, no matter what. You're among friends here, and we'll be there with you, freshmen or not.