...so why do we try so hard to prove to everyone else that we are?
I've blogged about this before. For whatever reason, there seems to be this pressure to make everyone else think that you don't have problems, or stressful things happening to you, or that there is nothing in your life that you are ashamed of. Which I think is sad, because I know from experience that the really difficult things help you grow the most. Why would you not be proud of that?
I took my mom to lunch a few days after Mother's Day, because (surprise, surprise) I had to work all day on the actual day. It was nice to spend time with her. We were talking about family, because I asked about how the family dinner went, and she said something that kind of surprised me. This isn't an exact quote, but it was something to the effect of...
"The more life I live, the more I've come to realize that there are no perfect families. It's just how you get through everything together that matters."
Wow. I was not expecting that. But that is a belief that my mom has held onto for a long time, because of that idea that you have to be perfect, because if you're perfect, there's no chance you can be unhappy.
But then it reminded me of something that my girlfriend often says...
"I don't think being gay is a trial for me. I think it's a trial for other people, to accept me and to love me without judgment. Maybe I am gay to help teach someone else tolerance."
Now, I'm not saying that you need to air your dirty laundry for everyone to see. That's not the point. But if it's generally accepted that nobody is perfect, I think it's okay to admit that no, you're not perfect.
So here I am. I'm not pretending to have the perfect life, free of stress and problems and sleepless nights. I have them. I for sure have them. But as long as I'm doing the best I can to live my life and be a good person, contribute in some positive way to the people around me, I don't see why that's not something to be proud of.
Nobody's perfect. It's not an excuse...it's a fact. So let's cut ourselves some slack. We have enough to worry about.